Beautiful piece, Matt. The bird that gets no love down here in Galveston & other parts of Texas is the common grackle. They are hard on crops & noisy & fairly plain & abundant. I like them.
Noem -- I'd guess killing a dog appeals to 45 on a gut level -- she's tough, & she's no simpy dog lover -- but his instincts have already told him it's a political loser.
Music -- Try Butch Hancock's "If You Were a Bluebird":
Butch was once called the Dylan of Texas. He's written many great songs. Decades ago he did a 6-night stand at Austin's Cactus Cafe where he played umpteen originals, all different. He released it as a 14-tape series called "No Two Alike."
Bird books -- Amy Tan has a new one called The Backyard Bird Chronicles that I'm enjoying.
Ahhh, I've made it a sort of a sub-specialty to extol Texas singer-songwriters in these pages. Everyone from Townes to Guy Clark to Nancy Griffith to Lyle Lovett to Robert Earl Keen. But I've never taken the Hancock plunge, so thanks for that.
And I might throw that Bird Chronicles book on the to-do list. Looks intriguing. I always thought grackles got a bad rap. But then, I'm not plagued by them, so I would say that.
Sparrows are just flying mice, an invasive species gift from England I think, and deserve no quarter. On the 1960's era farm I grew up on, my grandfather came up with a solution, at least in part. 11-year-old boys and BB guns, and a few cents bounty per carcass. It kept us occupied, depleted somewhat the sparrow population, who I swear knew the cocking sound a Daisy makes and took to wing. In the absence of wily sparrows within range, the lighting rods atop the barn, with their pretty glass bulbs, and the windmill tail and, well nearly everything else, made likely targets. Once, even a smart alecky younger brother. In any case, I'm sure you would be far more responsible than an 11 year old, so the answer is an air rifle, with optics and then you will literally kill two-birds with........two high velocity .177 caliber pellets. The bluebirds and the universe itself will sing your praise!
You're hardcore, dude. And I might be tempted. But the new-improved sparrow spooker seems to be working, knock on wood. Plus, I quit feeding the little bastards in my feeder across the yard, while I have young'uns in the box, so they haven't been making the scene. But if they make another invasion, never say never. We all have our limits. Violence isn't usually the answer. But sometimes, it's an answer.
Did you not SEE Aliens? I mean beyond the heavenly Sigourney Weaver? Snake and Nape the entire perimeter WHILE YOU STILL CAN! Sparrows take no prisoners and if their beady little brains had our tech they would show no mercy!!@
Wait the buses are part of the cabal now? I always worry about my dash-ins the lone day of the week I come into the office and overpay for parking like a boy scout.
Although you did your best to trigger my political instincts with your first four paragraphs, I'm going to follow your lead and go with the nature theme. But I can't resist one small Kristi Noem snark statement before I turn elsewhere. If memory serves, about half the pictures I have ever seen of the current governor of South Dakota show her in traditional western attire, astride a magnificently adorned horse, as part of an official state parade. So it's not all that hard to picture her astride that two-legged stallion, Corey Lewandowsky. I wonder if she wore her cowgirl hat?
Now about bluebirds, sparrows and catbirds. We have all three of these here in southern Wisconsin. I see the bluebirds the least of the three, although some folks have nest boxes and/or feeders and they claim to see them regularly. Sparrows are common, and catbirds are around - although I hear their distinctive cat-like call as much as I actually see them. In the very hottest days of the summer, we also get visited by giant black ground wasps - which really ties this nature story together, dude.
It is disconcerting when these big black insects show up each year because they always buzz you as you walk out the front door. But they are not there with any ill intent. They only want to squeeze down the cracks between my front walk and my garage foundation and deposit their eggs in the special chambers they labor so diligently to create. If you stretch out your arm and spread your fingers, you will get the picture perfectly.
Mama wasp constructs a main chamber with five smaller birthing chambers. In each of these chambers she places one of her sticky eggs attached to a big green katydid which she has captured, paralyzed with her special sting, and lugged down to the birthing chamber. Amazingly, the katydids do not die. They remain alive in suspended animation until the eggs hatch, so that the hungry larvae have something to eat as they grow. But mama wasp has to go out and capture each katydid individually, and this is where the plot thickens.
When returning with the paralyzed katydid, mama wasp has to run the gauntlet of the watchful birds lying in wait for an easy meal. Just as she attempts to maneuver her awkward green prize into position to take it down the crack she often gets mugged by a sparrow or a catbird. It's great work if you can get it. Just chill out in an adjacent tree, let the wasp do all the work, and then snatch her prize at her most vulnerable moment. I have personally observed both sparrows and catbirds pull off this trick. The wasp then patiently makes yet another run, to locate yet another katydid, and run the gauntlet all over again.
Karpas on a risen-gluten-filled matzah! (Bitter herbs on a gluten-filled-leavened-cracker {totally unKosher} (which will constipate you as well as make you feel the need to crap yourself, all at the same time!)
If there's one thing that animates the MAGA right, it's cruelty. I realize this isn't a new thought, but my thought is: Why? Why is cruelty animating? It is the very worst about our species. It's far worse than scavenger sparrows.
Kristi Noem is cruelty-signaling. Trumpers love it.
I found other appalling speculation: "Can J.D. Vance, Tim Scott, and Elise Stefanik also say that they also shot family pets?" Now who's the toughest VP wannabe?
Hey Kristi... meet me out by the gravel pit... for a wine and cheese picnic?
(She shot her dog and wounded, then took a second shot to kill her goat she didn't like... at a gravel pit near her property.)
Nothing as beautiful as Bluebirds here. When building my house, now 23 years ago, I had a summer visit by a pair of Flycatchers. What they lack in color, they more than make up in flying skill. These little flyers take full advantage of the wings they have nabbing insects of all sorts in midair with contortions of feathers no fan dancer ever imagined. Transporting a near endless stream of protein to their chirping young. The first year I encountered them, they had nested in the framing of a bathroom inside the forming house. After fledging of that first batch, I removed their nest. The next spring, with the house fully enclosed, they returned. They flew around for a few days and finally found a spot under the high eves on the east side of the house. They have been there since. There was a tragedy a few years ago when one died in my swimming pool. The other sat on the edge of the pool chirping furiously until I tripped to the accident. Too late. The lone parent carried on and hatched a brood that Summer. Double the work but no complaining that I saw. Now they are back in a pair once more. Lighting up the skies around the house with aerial stunts that defy description nabbing flyng bugs that have their own peculiar moves. Feeding the new batch of baby Flycatchers and the next residents of this nest I suppose.
I love a blue bird story. Your first blue bird story is well written and very memorable, but man it jerked at my heart. Last week we opened the front door to find a snake devouring the last of the barn swallows that had nested over the door. It's a two-story entrance, so that damned snake had to slither up a 20 foot brick wall to get to the nest. How the hell did he know that nest was there? Anyway, it's already inhabited by a fresh pair of barn swallows. And I have a bluebird couple inhabiting my Martin house, no martins at all but a bunch of tweety birds. Are those sparrows? Who knows? But the bluebirds don't give an inch to them. Last week there was a terrific battle that lasted at least 3 minutes. Constant dive bombing and wing slapping and pecking. Mr and Mrs Blue Bird worked as a great tandem, with her literally acting as his wingman. The battle seemed to end in a draw, as everyone is still occupying his nest.
Go Team Bluebird! Mine are usually pretty feisty, too. When there are eggs in the box, or the young have hatched, Dad always dive-bombs me, making that clacking sound, whenever I put worms in his tray. By now, he knows I'm not gonna hurt anyone. He also knows I'm a food source. But he does it anyway, just to stay in game shape I think. Which I totally respect.
I had sparrows nesting under my front porch roof -- making an unholy mess of the porch. I asked my cousin's Audubon Ranger husband what to do. "Kill them," he said. I found that a power washer surgically deployed was sufficient discouragement. Then the house finches moved in -- so neat, tidy, and civilized. Their territoriality (they love the seeds in my meadow) seems to have trumped the sparrows'.
As heartless assholes go, it’s going to be tough for anyone to top the governor of South Dakota. And that’s saying something given all the competition out there these days. Even the equally heartless orange crustacean she desperately hopes to serve as vice president has to be impressed with her soulless verve. The Orange God King never even got close to unloading a shotgun on a wondrous bird dog or getting horizontal behind closed doors with the likes of Corey Lewandowski. At least as far as anyone knows. As for sparrows being the avian version of unstoppable panzer units, who knew? Non moi. Until today’s Slack Tide, I would have been glad to swap out quite a few magpies cluttering the landscape of my Colorado abode for a few more sparrows. Guess not. Bring on the blue birds. But they should avoid flying into South Dakota where they have a governor who might have no problem unloading a shotgun on them.
Beautiful piece, Matt. The bird that gets no love down here in Galveston & other parts of Texas is the common grackle. They are hard on crops & noisy & fairly plain & abundant. I like them.
Noem -- I'd guess killing a dog appeals to 45 on a gut level -- she's tough, & she's no simpy dog lover -- but his instincts have already told him it's a political loser.
Music -- Try Butch Hancock's "If You Were a Bluebird":
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=szckJrrylKM
Butch was once called the Dylan of Texas. He's written many great songs. Decades ago he did a 6-night stand at Austin's Cactus Cafe where he played umpteen originals, all different. He released it as a 14-tape series called "No Two Alike."
Bird books -- Amy Tan has a new one called The Backyard Bird Chronicles that I'm enjoying.
Ahhh, I've made it a sort of a sub-specialty to extol Texas singer-songwriters in these pages. Everyone from Townes to Guy Clark to Nancy Griffith to Lyle Lovett to Robert Earl Keen. But I've never taken the Hancock plunge, so thanks for that.
And I might throw that Bird Chronicles book on the to-do list. Looks intriguing. I always thought grackles got a bad rap. But then, I'm not plagued by them, so I would say that.
Sparrows are just flying mice, an invasive species gift from England I think, and deserve no quarter. On the 1960's era farm I grew up on, my grandfather came up with a solution, at least in part. 11-year-old boys and BB guns, and a few cents bounty per carcass. It kept us occupied, depleted somewhat the sparrow population, who I swear knew the cocking sound a Daisy makes and took to wing. In the absence of wily sparrows within range, the lighting rods atop the barn, with their pretty glass bulbs, and the windmill tail and, well nearly everything else, made likely targets. Once, even a smart alecky younger brother. In any case, I'm sure you would be far more responsible than an 11 year old, so the answer is an air rifle, with optics and then you will literally kill two-birds with........two high velocity .177 caliber pellets. The bluebirds and the universe itself will sing your praise!
You're hardcore, dude. And I might be tempted. But the new-improved sparrow spooker seems to be working, knock on wood. Plus, I quit feeding the little bastards in my feeder across the yard, while I have young'uns in the box, so they haven't been making the scene. But if they make another invasion, never say never. We all have our limits. Violence isn't usually the answer. But sometimes, it's an answer.
Did you not SEE Aliens? I mean beyond the heavenly Sigourney Weaver? Snake and Nape the entire perimeter WHILE YOU STILL CAN! Sparrows take no prisoners and if their beady little brains had our tech they would show no mercy!!@
I believe this empanada place is by The Bulwark office (read: by the old TWS offices)! Walked by it on the way to Tabard last week.
Julia's Empanadas. One chorizo. One Jamaican. They've basically doubled in price since ye olde days. But then, what hasn't?
Let me take you to Arepa Zone.
Do they have bus cameras there to ticket you for dash-ins?
Wait the buses are part of the cabal now? I always worry about my dash-ins the lone day of the week I come into the office and overpay for parking like a boy scout.
If you're in a bus zone, they are fully deputized. And bus zones, apparently, seem to be about 50 yards. The Snitch Economy.
Nice Matt!- thank you- Phil.4:8 comes to mind.
Best is the pic of the set up- Box, double baffles with Sparrow Spooker on top....belongs in the Smithsonian.
Ahhhh. Good timing. Thx Matt. My BP just dropped into the green. A rough day but you helped round the edges a bit.
Humans fight one another. Any excuse will do if enough suppprt can be found. And, sadly, that seems a low bar.
Matt:
Although you did your best to trigger my political instincts with your first four paragraphs, I'm going to follow your lead and go with the nature theme. But I can't resist one small Kristi Noem snark statement before I turn elsewhere. If memory serves, about half the pictures I have ever seen of the current governor of South Dakota show her in traditional western attire, astride a magnificently adorned horse, as part of an official state parade. So it's not all that hard to picture her astride that two-legged stallion, Corey Lewandowsky. I wonder if she wore her cowgirl hat?
Now about bluebirds, sparrows and catbirds. We have all three of these here in southern Wisconsin. I see the bluebirds the least of the three, although some folks have nest boxes and/or feeders and they claim to see them regularly. Sparrows are common, and catbirds are around - although I hear their distinctive cat-like call as much as I actually see them. In the very hottest days of the summer, we also get visited by giant black ground wasps - which really ties this nature story together, dude.
It is disconcerting when these big black insects show up each year because they always buzz you as you walk out the front door. But they are not there with any ill intent. They only want to squeeze down the cracks between my front walk and my garage foundation and deposit their eggs in the special chambers they labor so diligently to create. If you stretch out your arm and spread your fingers, you will get the picture perfectly.
Mama wasp constructs a main chamber with five smaller birthing chambers. In each of these chambers she places one of her sticky eggs attached to a big green katydid which she has captured, paralyzed with her special sting, and lugged down to the birthing chamber. Amazingly, the katydids do not die. They remain alive in suspended animation until the eggs hatch, so that the hungry larvae have something to eat as they grow. But mama wasp has to go out and capture each katydid individually, and this is where the plot thickens.
When returning with the paralyzed katydid, mama wasp has to run the gauntlet of the watchful birds lying in wait for an easy meal. Just as she attempts to maneuver her awkward green prize into position to take it down the crack she often gets mugged by a sparrow or a catbird. It's great work if you can get it. Just chill out in an adjacent tree, let the wasp do all the work, and then snatch her prize at her most vulnerable moment. I have personally observed both sparrows and catbirds pull off this trick. The wasp then patiently makes yet another run, to locate yet another katydid, and run the gauntlet all over again.
Never trust a rabbit - unless its name is Harvey,
Karpas on a risen-gluten-filled matzah! (Bitter herbs on a gluten-filled-leavened-cracker {totally unKosher} (which will constipate you as well as make you feel the need to crap yourself, all at the same time!)
Keep writing them, Matt. Don't stop believin'
Constipation as well as urgency to go. Hmmm, a new fetish?
Hahaha! Good joke :)
Nope, nothing of the kind, she replied, kindly!
If there's one thing that animates the MAGA right, it's cruelty. I realize this isn't a new thought, but my thought is: Why? Why is cruelty animating? It is the very worst about our species. It's far worse than scavenger sparrows.
Kristi Noem is cruelty-signaling. Trumpers love it.
Actually, I was pleased to hear that she's gotten a fair amount of pushback even from the MAGAbots. Nobody likes a dog killer.
I found other appalling speculation: "Can J.D. Vance, Tim Scott, and Elise Stefanik also say that they also shot family pets?" Now who's the toughest VP wannabe?
Hey Kristi... meet me out by the gravel pit... for a wine and cheese picnic?
(She shot her dog and wounded, then took a second shot to kill her goat she didn't like... at a gravel pit near her property.)
So refreshing. Reminds me of Anne Murray’s “Snowbird”.
Nothing as beautiful as Bluebirds here. When building my house, now 23 years ago, I had a summer visit by a pair of Flycatchers. What they lack in color, they more than make up in flying skill. These little flyers take full advantage of the wings they have nabbing insects of all sorts in midair with contortions of feathers no fan dancer ever imagined. Transporting a near endless stream of protein to their chirping young. The first year I encountered them, they had nested in the framing of a bathroom inside the forming house. After fledging of that first batch, I removed their nest. The next spring, with the house fully enclosed, they returned. They flew around for a few days and finally found a spot under the high eves on the east side of the house. They have been there since. There was a tragedy a few years ago when one died in my swimming pool. The other sat on the edge of the pool chirping furiously until I tripped to the accident. Too late. The lone parent carried on and hatched a brood that Summer. Double the work but no complaining that I saw. Now they are back in a pair once more. Lighting up the skies around the house with aerial stunts that defy description nabbing flyng bugs that have their own peculiar moves. Feeding the new batch of baby Flycatchers and the next residents of this nest I suppose.
I love a blue bird story. Your first blue bird story is well written and very memorable, but man it jerked at my heart. Last week we opened the front door to find a snake devouring the last of the barn swallows that had nested over the door. It's a two-story entrance, so that damned snake had to slither up a 20 foot brick wall to get to the nest. How the hell did he know that nest was there? Anyway, it's already inhabited by a fresh pair of barn swallows. And I have a bluebird couple inhabiting my Martin house, no martins at all but a bunch of tweety birds. Are those sparrows? Who knows? But the bluebirds don't give an inch to them. Last week there was a terrific battle that lasted at least 3 minutes. Constant dive bombing and wing slapping and pecking. Mr and Mrs Blue Bird worked as a great tandem, with her literally acting as his wingman. The battle seemed to end in a draw, as everyone is still occupying his nest.
Go Team Bluebird! Mine are usually pretty feisty, too. When there are eggs in the box, or the young have hatched, Dad always dive-bombs me, making that clacking sound, whenever I put worms in his tray. By now, he knows I'm not gonna hurt anyone. He also knows I'm a food source. But he does it anyway, just to stay in game shape I think. Which I totally respect.
I had sparrows nesting under my front porch roof -- making an unholy mess of the porch. I asked my cousin's Audubon Ranger husband what to do. "Kill them," he said. I found that a power washer surgically deployed was sufficient discouragement. Then the house finches moved in -- so neat, tidy, and civilized. Their territoriality (they love the seeds in my meadow) seems to have trumped the sparrows'.
Thank you for giving me bluebirds again, Matt!
As heartless assholes go, it’s going to be tough for anyone to top the governor of South Dakota. And that’s saying something given all the competition out there these days. Even the equally heartless orange crustacean she desperately hopes to serve as vice president has to be impressed with her soulless verve. The Orange God King never even got close to unloading a shotgun on a wondrous bird dog or getting horizontal behind closed doors with the likes of Corey Lewandowski. At least as far as anyone knows. As for sparrows being the avian version of unstoppable panzer units, who knew? Non moi. Until today’s Slack Tide, I would have been glad to swap out quite a few magpies cluttering the landscape of my Colorado abode for a few more sparrows. Guess not. Bring on the blue birds. But they should avoid flying into South Dakota where they have a governor who might have no problem unloading a shotgun on them.
Where I live, it’s the crows. So many crows.