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My dental nightmare began in 2008 & it continues to this day. It’s been 14!years & I don’t think there’s any dental treatments left to end my misery once n for all. As a matter of fact I’ve had treatments in 3 different continentsS. Implants,Crowns,Bridge,Dentures etc,I’ve seen it all. I maintain a very oral hygienic yet the problem persists

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Ahhh...brings back memories. My first experience with dentists was pre-the-painless dentistry era. My dentist, who even though long deceased shall remain unnamed, was noted for his understanding of his patients' need for frugality. On each visit he would tell me that I was tough and didn't need novacaine to save my Mother an unnecessary expense. He repaired the little pinholed cavaties by drilling them out and filling in one big opening. The pain was enough to make your eyes bug-out!

In the Army I learned about painless dentistry. The care was quite good, except for the occasion where my racquet ball partner, the post dentist (we were the post doubles champs and he was the singles champ) shoe-horned out my four molars without novacaine, sending me on my way with two aspirins. I self-medicated by purchasing a bottle of Jim Beam at the Class 6 store.

Many years later in conversation with a weightlifting acquaintances, I discovered that he and I came from the same hometown. Among the stories that we shared was about dentists. I told him of my experience with Dr. M. He then exclaimed that within the Polish community that doctor was known as The Butcher.

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Awww...that sounds awful...your sense of humor about it though was refreshing

I was blessed with good teeth, never even had a cavity till my early 20's , and it was just two small ones in the back molars, never had another, never had a root canal, nothing, well, I did have two wisdom teeth removed ( the other two never grew in) ...except...my gums weren't as awesome...I had to have periodontal surgery...I. I don't react to locals well, including Novacaine...they last about 20 minutes then stop and more doesn't help.

So, my horror dental story is the anesthetic wore off about 20 minutes in and they had to cut back some of the bad gums without anesthesia...it was not pleasant and I guess I paid for all those years not needing any dental work...that is my dental horror story

I guess the old adage, you get what you pay for, holds true in your case?...lol

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As you return to the world from the shore after hanging with Colonel Skipper and clan welcome back. I needed a good giggle Matt. Thanks. One thing that has always been missing from OUR entire family both close and extended has been a dentist.

We have nurses phlebotomists pharmacists doctors of virtually every practice oncologists cardiologists surgeons even a bunch of brothers and their sons that owned their own hospital. CEO's CIO's Restauranteurs and Lawyers the list goes on and on all important careers that help the world go round. Everything BUT a Butcher for your mouth. Oh yeah we even had a Butcher in our extended family. How did the 5 branches of the Neffah family that tracks back to biblical times in Syria not have 1 stinking dentist?

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Nice story, posted with perfect timing. I already had a dental appointment scheduled for Monday.

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founding
Jun 17, 2022·edited Jun 18, 2022

I don't know what tickled me more . . . your description of each of his 'learning experiences' or your trepidation after trying to discuss Middle Eastern politics. Any attempt to ingratiate yourself with someone from that part of the world by guessing their preferences is ill-advised.

But then you already know that.

You're a pretty funny guy.

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founding

Here's where vanity gets the better of you and you decide to spring for the Mercedez Benz of teeth: https://www.dmagazine.com/publications/d-magazine/2013/september/the-32000-dollar-smile-veneers/

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Jun 17, 2022Liked by Matt Labash

I’m sorry Matt… I really am… for laughing at your pain. But I was crying literal tears (while sitting in a Chick-fil-A no less) as I read your Omar tale. While I enjoyed every word of your 11,000 word reflection on fly fishing wounded warriors (seriously, that piece was outstanding - well written as always - and both fascinating and deeply moving. Maybe you should go away more often if it means you will serve up older pieces like that!) I also needed the brief bit of laughter I just had, sadly, at your expense. You are a trip. Keep this stuff coming. I am loving Slack Tide. The old stuff and the new.

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My dad wasn't around much. He was busy being a pioneer in implant dentistry. He would have made a deal on the Jetta so you'd still be driving it. Then there's this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LPQSiTIb2Ac&t=11s

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https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=7cUZhHS0PMM

Surely I’m not the only one who thought of this while reading your post. Even if you’ve seen it before, I bet you’ll laugh…or identify with it.

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Matt. You owe Omar. He gave you material to write, and then to recycle.

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Jun 17, 2022Liked by Matt Labash

Matt, I missed this the first time around. It's hilarious (but not for you). Thanks for your writing.

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Jun 17, 2022Liked by Matt Labash

A dentist that I had from my early teen to early college ears developed cancer. He got into macrobiotic dieting in the hope that he could cure it, boost his immune response, etc.

I felt sympathetic for the guy, but he could lose focus, make GINORMOUS mistakes, etc. Plus, he looked like the GRIM REAPER was looking over his shoulder. He should've just packed it in, retired & referred me to another dentist.

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Is it "safe" yet ?

Two places u don't mess with dentist and proctologist!

Enough said .

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I love it !

that sordid experience

must have taught you

to get tough on abusers

all us commenters

are clear

that

nobody here

gets to play Omar

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