151 Comments
Apr 7, 2022·edited Apr 7, 2022

We should embrace this new, utilitarian Will Smith and send him, like a slap-happy avenging angel, on a tour of congress and the supreme court and see if he can slap some sense into them. One career may have ended - let another begin.

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Someone takes the last piece of pie, and you stab them with a fork. Safe to say: There's something else going on.

(Unless it's strawberry rhubarb. Then it's just self-defense.)

I feel sorry for Will Smith, let's leave it at that.

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The problem is the internet: In person interactions were changed forever by how we changed how we communicate on the internet. (i.e. it has worsened.)

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Other than this statement I can not comment on the slap

I knocked the crap out of a guy for disrespecting a homeless Vet this week at a Vet gathering.

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Will Smith should have handled the situation in private , but did Chris Rock forget that he co-wrote and narrated a documentary called Good Hair, for his daughter? He made fun of a black woman's hair. Both were at fault. I wonder if next year, they will do away with the insults?

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Online slaps in the face are just fine. Analog slaps are not. Really find it hard to believe Will Smith wasn’t escorted from the building, at the very least, after his assault on Chris Rock. How was that OK? Rock, a comedian, told a joke. It was at the expense of one of the stars in attendance, as are many of the jokes told at the Oscars. The aftermath, where Smith gets to hang around to accept one of the biggest awards of the night, is just surreal.

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I generally am against violence of any kind, ( though I will make begrudging exceptions for true self defense and necessary war events)...

It was a bad time to do what Will did, and should have been handled privately after the show...maybe minus the slap and when he cooled down

That said, as someone who was married to a guy who was never on my side, ( and I wouldn't have expected violence) I admit I am envious of Jada for at least having someone who defended her, which to me indicates some measure of care....in the biggest example he let a large group of supposed devout Catholics ostracize, tell lies about me and shove me off the board of the organization, and never said a word, even though he actually agreed with me on the issues they were mad at me for.

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Instead of talking about Will, the conversation should focus on what Denzel had to say. https://www.joestrupek.com/the-devil-at-the-oscars

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Has this slap thing, arisen from the micro aggression world? Are we in for an escalation in physical violence over unintentional, and unknown to us, displays of perceived aggressions requiring violent response? I use the word "race" at the Indy 500 and am pounced upon by the hyper sensitive? Now, in fairness, Chris Rock can be a bit annoying and probably deserves some occasional backlash - not so much a backhand. Piggish might not be too harsh a word. Smith is hardly a paragon of sensibility so when these two are slapping it out in a wallow, not such news. And the media are learning once again, that building a multistory edifice of outrage out of wet and slimy wallow mud is not easy, however popular.

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Here’s an interesting thought: the public response shaming Will Smith has been more proactively critical and nonpartisan than any response to any of Trump’s four years of smacking America and it’s citizens in the mouth.

This is a very unifying moment.

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"Made the whole thing up," you say? I give you no less unimpeachable a source than Roger Friggin' Stone, okay. https://twitter.com/RonFilipkowski/status/1509709895473500163?t=zR1ogpAioOnQT1fH33qOKw&s=19

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Let’s pray for them all !

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Oh boy as a paid subscriber I will go to the top of the list.

No comment on Hollywood (it could have been staged)

Regarding the honorable Madison Cawthorne, why does he know so much about cocaine and sex parties? Unless he was at those parties and asked not to come back. What a duche!

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The owners of the four major media outlets and publishing of written news and editorial, slap them for me and keep them down for a 10 count. They have controlled the lies and spread of Marxism long enough!

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Brings to mind the German word backpfeifengesicht.

First I'd like to smack the smirk off Ted Cruz's mug. Then deliver a swift kick where it hurts to Mitch McConnell.

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I read a good book called “Why Buddhism is Right.” The author apologizes for the simplistic title by explaining what he means in more detail. But he points out, as many have, that our brains were wired for living in a hunter gatherer society 10,000 years ago. I subscribe to this. It explains so many aberrant behaviors. Take road rage. Utterly illogical, you’ll never see that person again. But 10,000 years ago everyone knows each other in the tribe. The author argues that if you are deeply insulted in front of the tribe you have two choices. Walk away and be looked down upon, a less desirable mate to be sure, or fight. He argues you MUST fight, even if you know you will lose. You bloody him as best you can and the tribe will realize, if I mess with this guy I’ll pay a price I’d rather not pay. Was that the instinct that motivated Smith? Who knows. I’m just trying to point out how irrational humans can become under stress and under the eyes of a crowd.

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Jada Pinkett Smith could have marched up there and slapped Chris Rock herself. If she had, I think we would be having a different conversation. She would have been the victim and Chris Rock would have been the goat. Exact same action....different result. Go figure.

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founding

It does strike me that the Democrats in Congress are a target rich environment for dispensing of slaps, starting with Madame Speaker herself. Fair and balanced there, Matt.

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Perhaps the perfect blend of frustration and incredulity.

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It would benefit humanity greatly if someone slapped Cucker Tarlson hard enough nightly to set his grandma’s gravestone a’rattlin’!

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I’m glad you did this on a Friday afternoon, Matt. I no longer need to buy booze.

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Dangerous time to invite questions on bashing of those who would might normally never bash Labash. By dangerous I , of course refer to the ever welcoming Friday happy hour with its smorgasbord of free topics; wow, death and orgies.

Here, I defer to the expert, Woodie Allan. You judge his expertise. Woodie was asked if he could imagine anything worse than death. Yes, said Woodie, have you ever spent an hour with a life insurance agent ?

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All I care about is, WHERE IS MY SONG! Have no, zip, nada, zero interest in this story, except thank God it wasn’t racist. Always looking for the one-colored rainbow.

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If I learned anything as a young NeoCon it is that any problem can be fixed with the proper application of (military) force. Also to stay consistent, the Nashville Bro Country Cabal needs a slap. So does my neighbor who puts up his inflatable Santa at Halloween.

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Who needs to be slapped into their senses? That's an easy one: Rupert Murdoch

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This is an easy one: No excuse. Plain and simple. Can you imagine how Will Smith would have been praised had he walked on the stage, put his arm around Chris and quietly explained to him that his wife had alopecia and that his joke was extremely insensitive and inappropriate and he would sincerely appreciate if he would apologize to her right now which, of course, he would have done. I suppose he could have added that if he didn't, he would beat him to a pulp but I suspect that wouldn't have been necessary. Easy to say after the fact with time to think I know but I was taught that the high road always wins in the long run and usually the short run too. I was extremely disappointed to hear that Will Smith's son tweeted "And that's how we do it" afterward. Great values he's passing on.

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Matt, After your punch lines about mouthing off, I would have placed a $100 bet that your song for the day would have been Bob Dylan's, "Idiot Wind," from Blood on the Tracks.

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I should really become a paid subscriber. This is the first time I've been allowed to comment anywhere while not yet paid up. So, not to waste this moment any further, I've cut n pasted a fair few Labash essays here, the xmas one comes to mind. Good mix of sweet n sour. As a non-practicing Democrat (very very moderate, and ambivalent etc) myself I v much appreciate the same from Labash but from the other direction........... OK!!! Now! Violence. There are levels. A slap is not a punch is not a gunshot etc. But things can escalate. And role models teach folk how to act. Anyway! Chris Rock always has been a genius, as a stand up anyway. I just hope he gets super more famous from this.

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Apr 1, 2022Liked by Matt Labash

Hey Matt, this newsletter slaps (HAHAHA, get it?!) But seriously, I think you captured almost all of the ridiculousness of the week in a few short paragraphs. Well done!

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Apr 1, 2022·edited Apr 1, 2022

No profanity?! Then I'm out, damnit.

But, before I go...I don't think the threat of a punch in the kisser for crossing some line has a "civilizing influence on society", but it does perhaps have a calming one. (words) What the heck do we take civilized to mean these days anyway, beyond not committing mass murder or engaging in pedophilia or some other seriously heinous behavior? It sure as H-E-double-Hockey-Sticks doesn't refer to the way we once thought of ourselves as a society, back in the day (or whenever it was) that rudeness, bullying, and just plain old fasion uncouth behavior were the exception rather than the most prevalent distraction proffered by the terminally self-important and self-righteous.

But I digress form my original purpose, which was to say that while there is a plethora of those in public life who once would have been persona non grata in a heretofore reasonably polite society, and who are now publicly duking it out both verbally and physically for our attention and some proper street cred with their own, any desire to see "some good sense slapped back into them" will ultimately go unfulfilled, no matter how much palm-flesh meets cheek. They didn't have any of the stuff to begin with, and you ain't gonna' instill it with a few measly swats to the jaw. Want evidence of their lack of said virtue? Well, they've chosen to live a "public life", haven't they? These days, who with any common sense (or even a modicum of common sanity) would do that?

One other thing, as long as I'm weighin' in (might as well weigh in a little heavy, in keeping with the effect of this laptop on my waistline) ...Is violence "a free-speech suppressant"?

Gee. I dunno'. I'm hangin' out on the corner by a local bar, waitin' for the light to turn. A half dozen 200-pounders in full MAGA dress ensembles stumble out of the bar and stand around behind me, mouths spewing Trump Tripe as they wait. Being a Never Trumper, I feel an urge to speak. This is, after all, actually "the public square" where we're standing. Do I say what's truly on my mind? Like maybe... Hey y'all, Trump (verb referring to the sound of a vacuum cleaner). And you guys are a bunch of (lady parts Trump is known for grabbing) for buyin' into that (what baby diapers are used to collect).

I mean, it's a free country ain't it? Or is it?

You tell me.

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Not sure if it's still a thing, for a time the meme "punch a Nazi" had a fair amount of traction. The principle, apparently, was violence is acceptable against unacceptable people. In fact, it might even teach them a lesson! Maybe in theory, but the problem is there is widespread disagreement about who is a fascist and/or unacceptable. I've seen video of antifa types punching out a young man for the heinous transgression of carrying an American flag, because, you know, to antifa that makes you a fascist.

So, does the threat of getting punched in the face having a civilizing influence? Depends on the circumstances, but in general I would say no. Violence begets violence. If you want to some graphic illustrations, watch some videos of left wing and right-wing protestors squaring off to protest each other and notice what happens when things escalate from shouting to punching.

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Will Smith has restored my faith in corporal punishment.

As a general rule, I have not been much of a Will Smith fan. In the few movies of his that I have seen, he was always running around doing silly stuff like punching out aliens. My general impression is that his roles and his acting have matured over the years. (You may have also noticed that Tom Hanks is no longer fighting volcanos, either.) And I have to admit that there was always something carnal deep inside of me that enjoyed Kevin Hart's "in your face" smart mouth. But sooner or later, "smart mouth" always seems to cross a line. And that's what happened last Sunday night.

If you want to see what respect looks like, listen to what Hart said after Smith told him, for the second time, to keep his wife's name out of his mouth. Hart replied, with humble sincerity, that this was exactly what he was fully intending to do - even as the left side of his newly sobered face was still glowing from Smith's open-handed caress. There were no jokes, no smart mouth, just, ``Yes sir, I'll be careful to do that.``

No, it wasn't the best way to handle it, and it wasn't the right time or place. But Smith did what husbands often used to do. The beloved Russian poet, Alexander Pushkin, died at the very height of his literary career, when he challenged a man to a duel under similar circumstances. Unfortunately, Pushkin was a better writer than he was a shooter.

And then there is the little matter of the hypocritical Motion Picture Academy. This governing body is struggling with how to punish Smith for his husbandly response. This is the same group that for the past fifty years has allowed, promoted and rewarded films with ever-increasing violence portrayed in increasingly vivid detail. They have picked a fine time to "get religion."

Smith dealt with the situation in the same way that such things are dealt with everyday in the real world, on street corners all over the country - when someone says something disrespectful about someone else's "mama." The only difference was that the cameras were on Sunday night and the snowflakes were offended.

There is one way that these two diverse threads could be satisfactorily reconciled. If only Madison Cawthorn would be so foolish as to say something stupid about Jada Pinkett Smith...

Please, Lord, just this once!

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I might be only person on planet that has read/heard 800 takes, not seen the video and enjoyed priest spin incident into Wednesday’s homily involving the gospel. This is my first and last comment on this. 🤣

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Much of the American voting public deserves a good sense slap. We must elect serious and responsible leadership at the local, state, and federal levels. Democracy matters, and will produce better outcomes more often than the strongman 'when you're a star, you can do whatever you want' method. Let's be done with non-serious, attention seeking politicians and their pawns.

On Will Smith... Damn. What Will Smith did was wrong. But. But. But. In that moment, a confluence of past events, memories of past troubles, coursed through Will's veins. In that moment Will felt a consolidated rush of past and present humiliation. Will was a pushed too far. Fight or Flight. Or, in this case, Fight, Flight, or Slap. Who in life hasn't faced and felt a moment like this? Some people walk away and suffer humiliation in isolation. Some people pull non-tangible or tangible triggers in public. I don't condone what Will did. But I have empathy for Will and that emotional state. The short term pain of suffering humiliation in silence is a better choice than the long term pain of Fight or Slap or Otherwise in public.

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When I started high school 66 years ago, I was an undersized five foot, 100 pound 13 year old. In the first week I made the mistake of smarting off to a guy eight inches taller and fifty pounds heavier. He proceeded to give me a punch in the mouth (and eyes, and jaw, etc). It definitely had a civilizing influence on me. When I grew to man size over the next year and a half, I never forgot the lesson that actions can have consequences.

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Hypothetically, there may be a time and a place for one man smacking another man upside the head, but a formal gala on live TV is surely not one of them. Smith is so deep in the ultra-privileged, Hollywood Star bubble he's forgotten normal laws and social norms apply to him too. What he did was childish and unacceptable, but not unforgivable. He had a bad moment. People shouldn't be defined by their bad moments.

I wouldn't say "violence of any kind is always unforgivable." I would say violence is a bad idea in civil society and "use your words" is good advice that should go without saying for adults.

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"Who, in public life, most needs some good sense slapped back into them?"

I nominate the Republican members (who make up the majority) of the Ohio Redistricting Commission. I was so angry over their latest shenanigans on Monday that I got supremely annoyed by the Oscars kerfuffle dominating the entire news cycle.

Apparently the constitutional crisis unwinding in Ohio isn't especially top of mind for the country as a whole but as another data point in the ongoing saga of Republicans behaving badly, it has implications beyond Ohio's voters. While Ohio is in no danger of becoming a blue state, it's far more evenly divided than the gerrymandered districts we've lived with since the 2010 census.

It appears two state constitutional amendments to correct this are inadequate to persuade Republicans that losing their super majority is a feature, not a bug, of the process.

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Great question, when i can stop laughing while and after reading your article I might be able to process it. It’s a good bet that Hunter’T’ gives you five digits up!

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The amazing amount of non-gun violence that we have been seeing/experiencing across the country over the past 2+ yrs is unfathomable. The people who feel it’s OK to haul off against flight attendants or other pax on planes is unexplainable. It is not mask-mandates that made people more violent but something has. Were the Covid lockdowns analogous to the effects of solitary confinement on prisoners, such that many people have forgotten the lessons they learned in pre-school/kindergarten? It seems like it. Did interacting anonymously only through screens make it worse? Of that I have no doubt. I have no idea how we re-civilize the country. The Oscars producers certainly did not take the right steps.

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Matt, I actually agree with you 100% on the civilizing influence of the fear of violence. I’d take it further than the Internet and say that many elites’ scorn for the average person has been allowed to grow out of control by the successful minimization of what used to be considered ‘fighting words’ into some sort of expectation that violence is never the appropriate response to absolutely any speech.

I’m not sure that makes the person who maintains this more through their belligerence any more morally justified, despite the generally laudatory outcome of their uncontrollable behavior.

People have weird blindspots. Is physical violence always more painful than words? No matter the severity of the violence or the words? I don’t think so. Do we need such a bright line, are we really in need of an absolute where one is okay and the other is never, or can we make nuanced and contextual determinations?

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“ Who, in public life, most needs some good sense slapped back into them?”

The obvious answer to me would be Vladimir Putin. Although if we’re limiting it to Americans I’ll say Glenn Greenwald, who “isn’t on Putin’s side” but probably is “just asking questions” or something.

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I've been told to hold my tongue about this because Jada is disabled. I'm like... what, unable to grow hair?

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I would have to put Commander Bone Spurs first. As far as Mike Tyson goes: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3f6OZlCVJx0

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Okay, first things first. Let’s address your claim, Matt, that Paul Gosar finds paid subscribers to Slack Tide the bee’s knees when it comes to orgiastic desirability. Since I can never remember the (mostly alleged and usually confused) differences between “punishment” and “negative reinforcement” and getting punched by Mike Tyson, I think I’m gonna classify this as a “truly negative punishment” for subscribing to Slack Tide.

Now, I’ve been operating on the presumption that you actually want readers—and you want those readers to be paid subscribers and drinkers of the Lefty Kreh Was a God kool-aid, if I understand correctly. But now you’re waving this Paul-Gosar-finds-paid-subscribers-most-desirable threat/warning/DefCon4 alarm in our faces? Tch, tch, my friend. I suggest rethinking your tactics. (Sub-tip: Don’t hire Vladimir Putin as a consultant on this matter.)

Speaking of special military operations, let’s get back to the violence.

Violence is bad, on that we all agree. Except on the football field. Or before, during, and after hockey games, especially on the ice. And violence on screens is pretty popular and profitable, judging by recent years’ crops of popular TV shows (The Walking Dead, anyone?), video games, graphic novels, the entire Marvel universe, and every Jean Reno, Arnold Schwarzenegger, or famous Buddhist actor Steven Seagal movie. Heck, even Marky Mark left the hip-hop world (itself not known as a prime producer of peace and kindness) to join in the violent fun. Then there’s the burgeoning popularity of “unlimited fighting championships”, mixed-martial-arts fighting, etc. And what happens whenever a Democrat is elected to the Oval Office? Gun sales go through the roof. (I’ve never been clear on whether they shoot holes in the roof first, but….)

Ever since I read Lord of the Flies in eighth grade, I’ve wondered if humans don’t have a subconscious (and sometimes entirely conscious) craving for violence. “Kill the Pig! Kill the Pig! Kill the Pig!” We just don’t want it going on too close to ourselves, for fear of getting caught by a stray bullet or flying round-house kick or whatever. But put the violence at a convenient remove, leaving us with a good view, and we’re happy.

All of this seems predicated upon a simple premise: that violence can serve not just a productive function (productivity being morality-neutral), but a function for *good*. Killing people that look like me? Bad. Decapitating zombies with a chain saw? Good. Smacking around a child? Bad. Destroying the Death Star and all the non-combatant janitors, food servers, and the like as well as the Really Bad Guys? Good. Capital punishment? Bad. Killing Osama bin Laden? Good.

Violence is, like productivity, it seems, morality-neutral. Context matters. Goals and objectives matter. Presence or absence of options matters. I’d happily perform a violent act or two in defense of refugees trying to flee Mariupol. I’ll just as readily condemn violence of the sort propagated by the Putins of the world, used as means of advancing one’s own desires at the expense of the lives and freedom of others.

Was Will Smith justified, was his act proper? I don’t think so, but I’ll also admit I’ve not even watched the video clip, let alone tried to learn whether there’s more to the story, etc. So my opinion on that is worth about what I got paid for it—zip. Maybe it’s good for us to remember that, too.

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Hmm, there's have a triangulation going on, "slap-gate" vs. M.Cawthorn vs. trans-women.

It's a "narcissism match" real attention getters showing off the degradation of society and blowing up all norms of decency. Anything for power. The reality that the blow back is more talk, a rousing applause from the audience with the sycophants saying, oh well, that's good for ratings. There was never a "we" or "us" in their vocabulary. It's only about "them". Well, "they" are in for a magnificent surprise. ;o)

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Apr 1, 2022·edited Apr 1, 2022

My son is eleven, and knows Will Smith from MIB and Chris Rock from Sandler's "Grownups." I told him about the slapping event. He said, "He didn't punch him?" I said no, that a punch would have likely hurt both guys. He shrugged, and responded, "Only girls slap." Good boy.

So Will Smith slaps Chris Rock on behalf of his wife, Jada. And afterwards, the two guys who stand up, Denzel Washington and Tyler Perry (who seem like good guys, honestly), try to calm things down. I guess Hollywood is going to have to update their trending Twitter hashtags from 2015.

Come on Hollywood. You had an international audience of dozens and dozens of people watching this debacle. Be better.

As for Madison Cawthorn, sheesh. Republicans, you don't counter the extreme (and at times anti-semitic) hard-left views of The Squad by trying to create your own with the likes of Cawthorn and Boebert, et al.

Slaps all around. (Except for Rock. He was just doing what comedians do. And not Denzel or Tyler. Peacemakers, right?)

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Regarding the Oscars and Congress, I have to note that should aliens arrive, desire to take over, and seem to have a halfway decent plan for this galactic penal colony we call home, I’m very likely to view them more favorably than the leaders we’ve got and I will absolutely hear them out.

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Will Smith, aside from his adulterous marriage, has always seemed like a genuine good guy. If there is such a thing, apart from the Son of God. However, in this instance, Smith showed how incredibly entitled he felt, and what an incredibly low view he has of Chris Rock. I guarantee if 91 year old Clint Eastwood made that same joke, Smith sits there and takes it. Also, I believe when he laughed at the joke, and then saw his wife's reaction he was ashamed of himself, and his ego got in the way of common sense. We all have moments in our lives that bring us great shame. At least I do. And now, so does Will Smith. Mine is hidden in my unremarkable history. Smith's, like Mel Gibson's, will leave an unremovable stain. I believe he will spend many hours from 2-4 AM reliving with deep regret that little 5 second tantrum.

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Regarding our inflation scarred economy, I cannot best Hitchens commenting on the 2008 aftermath:

“ What are the main principles of a banana republic? A very salient one might be that it has a paper currency which is an international laughingstock: a definition that would immediately qualify today’s United States of America. We may snicker at the thriller from Wasilla, who got her first passport only last year, yet millions of once well-traveled Americans are now forced to ask if they can afford even the simplest overseas trip when their folding money is apparently issued by the Boardwalk press of Atlantic City.”

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The rule should be that a person can only slap someone when the offending party has at least 10 pounds on the offended/slapping party. If it’s that serious a violation of your code of honor, you should be willing to accept the consequences of defending it.

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